1. Some people get emotional satisfaction from
talking about how awful other people are. But research has found that when you
talk negatively to say, a friend about how awful a colleague is, the listener
is more likely to associate the negativity to you, rather than to the person
you are describing. Researchers call the spontaneous trait transference'. So it
is best to go easy on bad mouthing others because it may backfire. Anyway
2. It takes a big person to accept outwardly and
inwardly that they are at fault. I am not saying we should never blame other
people. Sometimes others are at fault and they need to know it and take
responsibility. But being able to accept responsibility when that is right
means we actually become less helpless and passive.
3 If everything is someone else's fault, then
what part to do I play in my own life? Are my actions entirely without
consequence? Am I that powerless? Or do all my actions only lead to good
outcomes?
4. Am I an entire new type of human being? Knowing
we can accept responsibility when things go wrong means we can also accept
credit when things go well. We do, as individuals, have an effect on life; and
that is a good thing.
5. But we need to develop the capacity to be
objective enough about ourselves to avoid assuming we could never possibly have
created problems ourselves. We also need to distinguish between accepting
responsibility and punishing ourselves unduly.
6. If you are used to just dishing out the blame
and not accepting your part, remember the research that shows being able to apologize
in relationships makes them much more likely to last and thrive.
7. Ever noticed how some people get more hung up
on assigning blame than actually fixing a problem. if people feel you blame
them unfairly. they will resent you. They may even come to hate you. They may
even come to hate you. People instinctively hate injustice. People can be
shouted at, cursed at, and blamed, but still do not know what it is they did
wrong.
8. Calling someone an idiot or telling them they
always do everything wrong! is not feedback, it is just abuse, no matter why
you think you are doing it. This kind of emotional incontinence may make people
anxious, but they will never respect you because it displays your weaknesses so
clearly.
9. As the wise Roman emperor Marcus Aurelius
said. "How much more grievous are the consequences of angerthan the causes
of it."Life is full of people who take emotional short cuts and blame
other people unfairly or aggressively; for the sake of the human race, don't be
one of them. But I would not blame you if you were.
On the basis of your
reading of the passage, answer any ten of the following questions. 1X10=10M
1) As
per the author, we as individuals have an ___________on___________
2) The
correct meaning of ‘screwed –up’ as used in the passage?
3) If
you blame someone unfairly, he/she will ___________you.
a)
resent b) like
c) hate d)advocate e) compliment
i) a
and c ii) b and e iii) d and b iv) d and e
4) In
the following passage, the author urges us to
a) ignore
the role we play in our lives
b) criticize
and blame others
c)
reflect on the role we play in our lives
d)
never blame anyone even if they are wrong
5)
select the option that makes the correct use of ”fault” as used in the passage
a)
surveyors say that the fault line is capable of generating a major earthquake
b) A
fault is committed in tennis when the server hits the net with the ball.
c) Rupam
is the one who is always finding fault with something or someone
d) A
fault fracture or zone of fractures between two blocks of rocks
6)
what does punishing ourselves unduly mean?
7) Which
example did the author give to explain the importance of accepting our
mistakes?
8)
What objective quality should we develop?
a) To criticize others when it is necessary
b) To
blame ourselves when it is something else’s fault
c) To
assume we could never create problems ourselves
d) To
avoid thinking that we could create problems ourselves.
i) a
and b ii) only c iii) only d iv) b and d
9) Which
of the following will be a suitable title for the passage?
a)
The Blame Game
b)
Spontaneous Trait Transference
c)
How and when to Blame
d)
Accept it when you’re wrong
10) Which
word is an antonym of ‘distinguish’ as used in para 5?
11) What is good for maintaining healthy
relationships?
12) The
meaning of the quote in the last para of the passage is
a)
The consequences of anger are worse and more hurtful than its cause
b)
There are no consequences of anger
c) The
consequences of anger do not matter in the long run
d)
The consequences of anger are less trustful than its cause
